When Should I Talk to My Kid(s) About Sex?
When should I talk to my kids about sex?
Ideally we have many, many conversations with our kids and not one “talk” like we may’ve received years ago. Most experts suggest that starting earlier is better so that it normalizes the conversation. That means when we teach body parts to babies we include the accurate names for genitals, that we teach toddlers that they don’t have to hug someone if they don’t want to, and we teach kids to expect and show respect in relationships. But unless your child is growing up on a farm you may not be talking to your kids about eggs and sperm and ovulation. When do we do that??
I like to say 7 is heaven, eight is great, 9 is the line. I know that seems scary sometimes. A friend asked “what happens for kids who haven’t heard the info before then?” The sky won’t fall, there’s just a much higher chance they’ve heard the informational somewhere else and you don’t get to control the narrative. If a child has already heard information from peers or books or (god forbid, YouTube), there are two things that happen.
That information is often inaccurate, and kids fill in the parts they don’t know with guesses that are also inaccurate, and
That information doesn’t include any of your family’s values, often doesn’t include any context about healthy relationships, and doesn’t help create a healthy dialogue with the parent.
For parents that are nervous that their children are too young and naive to get the whole picture of repropruction, I often tell them f they want to keep their child innocent, hearing the information from you before peers have had a chance to spill it is a great way to keep them innocent. If they know the facts then they don’t need to go to peers or books or the internet for information that you may not condone.
